Let’s face it. Going missional is going against the grain of culture. It’s filled with potholes, bad directions, even roadside bombs, and dead ends. People are taken hostage by culture and an “other than God” desire to live their life the way that looks good to them.
Helping people see a real God who says, “Let’s go this way instead,” is really tough. It’s a long, hard, even dangerous, road.
Raw anguish crashes around in our souls waiting for them to realize; to change their direction; to say Yes to Jesus today.
So when someone responds, it’s rather incredulous! When someone says, “I want to invest my life in Jesus and really DO this thing,” we feel like heaven opened up. It often actually brings me to tears when it happens. “Wow, God, you are awesome!” And even sometimes, it feels like the mission God has me on might just take off; that there might be another who “will get it” and move out into the world sharing how awesome Jesus is. “God, you sent me someone who really wants to get it.”
The cost suddenly was worth it. The dreams of this person becoming part of an active team, living the life and evangelizing and making an impact where Jesus is at work, explode in my very being.
“Victory in Jesus” drips from our lips like honey off a biscuit!
But then.
Come on, there’s sometimes a “but then.”
God lives in our “but thens.”
I was having a “but then” moment today and the Lord said, “Write this down so you’ll remember.”
Do you ever have pity parties for yourself, or is it just me?
“Oh God, this person has so much potential. What went wrong? Why are they taking every other track except for the one which leads to You? Why are they making themselves miserable? Can’t they see?”
Which sometimes leads to, in me, “Am I doing any good, really?” My disappointment in someone becomes a growing sea of angst and questioning … and whether I just wasted my time on this person.
A seed of bitterness begins to take root. Not so much bitterness with God, but the bitter taste of this kind of missionary work. The bitterness of sorrow. The bitterness of wrongness. The bitterness of “what ifs.” The bitterness of having to correct someone in love rather than just agree and smile even. Can I look at this person and pretend as if everything is alright when they’ve rejected Jesus’s way?
Where there was sunshine, now a spiritual darkness lies in this relationship. Should I walk away? It’s really uncomfortable to stay and sit when someone is embedded in sin, especially when it personally costs you more to stay and sit.
And in a small whisper, but clear and distinct teaching moment, God said to me, “But Sandy, you don’t serve [insert name of person you are discipling]. You serve Me. Your work and life is not dependent upon [name’s] response to my invitation. Your work and life are dependent upon Me and my invitation to you. Simply respond to me.”
Oh yeah.
A confession my friends. I needed God to remind me today about truth. God is very graceful with it. I want to pay attention to His reminder.
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